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    美麗的夏天

    時間:2019-06-30 19:43:58  作者:  來源  查看:0
    美麗的夏天

    夏天是炎熱的,在很多人眼里,夏天是最糟糕的季節,但在我的眼里,夏天是美麗的。【評:“我”對夏天的評價。】
    夏日的晴空是明媚的,天是湛藍湛藍的,太陽像火球般炙烤著大地,陽光是那樣強烈,天上地下都處于一片耀眼的光明之中。陽光在蕩漾的大路上,泛起萬點金光,像一顆顆晶瑩的小星,頑皮地向人們眨著眼睛。【評:描寫夏天的天空、太陽、陽光下的大路。】
    夏天的天氣非常非常的炎熱。熱的(得)連狗都趴在樹蔭下,吐出那鮮紅的舌頭,不停地大口喘著粗氣;雞熱得耷拉著腦袋,有氣無力地走著;樹陰下一位老爺爺喝著茶水,扇著扇子,嘴里還說著:“這該死的天氣,太熱了!”【評:用具體的事例、形象的語言描寫了夏天的炎熱。】
    夏天是一個愉快的季節,女士們都可以穿上漂亮輕柔的連衣裙,露出雪白的肌膚,顯出自己苗條的身材;男士們都穿上了帥氣的西褲短袖,一身輕松;小孩們隨時都可以吃到美味、香甜可口的冰淇淋,真是舒服、痛快啊!【評:女士、男士的衣著以及孩子們吃的美味,來說明夏天的愉快。】
    夏天是多姿多彩的。路邊的樹翠綠翠綠的,綠得像油似的要流下來。樹下的草坪像給大地披上了墨綠的毯子。花壇里開著五顏六色的鮮花,白的如雪,紅的似火,黃的賽金,粉的像霞……【評:樹的翠綠、草的碧綠和花的五顏六色,寫出了夏天的多姿多彩。】
    夏天的雷雨也是讓我心動的。雖然打雷時,雷聲震耳欲聾,讓人感到害怕。但是雷雨過后,天氣一放晴,天空就會變得如此美麗。天空還會掛出美麗的彩虹。彩虹像一座五彩繽紛的天橋,好像穿過這座橋,就可以到達仙境一般。【評:雨時和雨后的不同景象。】
    夏天的夜空也是迷人的。晚上,坐在一棵大樹下乘涼,抬頭遙望天空的繁星,是那樣的美妙。星星一眨一眨的,像一只只眼睛在注視著(這個)世界。【評:夜空的迷人。】
    我愛夏天,神秘的夏天,美麗的夏天!
    評語
    “我愛夏天,神秘的夏天,美麗的夏天”,這是全文的結尾句,也點明這篇文章的中心、全文就是圍繞夏天的“神秘”和“美麗”這兩個特點來組織材料的。小作者從天上的陽光、天氣的炎熱、人們的愉快、景色的多彩、雷雨后的美景以及夜空的迷人等多個方面來描述夏天。文中的夏天給人的感覺是,既炎熱又是愉快,既多姿多彩又美妙莫測。內容生動具體,描寫細膩形象。
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